Beware the Brotherhood

"In the darkness, the Brotherhood silently protects the interests of the people." Those noble words have long concealed a dangerous organization that destroys our children. The clandestine organization known as "The Brotherhood" claims to enhance life for future generations by genetically modifying children to enhance their intellect and physical strength. Many of these genetically modified children, however, have suffered long-term damage due to unforeseen side effects of The Brotherhood's "enhancements." Harlow Doyle, a private investigator from Odyssey, is but one of the many victims of Brotherhood experiments gone awry. At five years of age, this brilliant orphan (with an I.Q. of 147) received experimental treatment from Brotherhood scientists to augment his already stellar mental capabilities. The experiment failed miserably, and his subsequent I.Q. scores averaged at 52. He operates his detective agency on a monthly allowance from his well-to-do adopted parents, and rarely solves a case without his clients' assistance. Other victims of The Brotherhood's harebrained mad scientists include residents of mental institutions, recipients of special education, and--most shocking of all--65% of The Brotherhood's "experimental children" have developed cancerous brain tumors by the age of 50. This subversive organization claims to protect our interests by enhancing children's futures, yet ill effects are evident in almost every patient. Please join me in signing this petition (by commenting with your name) to bar The Brotherhood from practicing in the United States.